Monday, April 11, 2011

Try not to cry...

I know everyone that knows me thinks I am all about boner jokes and pretending that I am some tough guy. The truth is I am a softy. I think that's why Jason and I are such good pals. When we aren't guessing how big the kings of the chopper scenes wieners are we are spilling our guts about the stuff that really matters. We are alway on the verge of tears in his garage. Family is a big deal to both of us. This post is more personally pertaining to me but it all relates to how i think both of us feel about our dads.

Just over 3 years ago my pop had a severe stroke. I still remember the night I got the call. I just got back to my shop at 3:30 in the morning and I could barely keep my eyes open. My head hits the pillow and my phone just starts ringing. I pick it up and its my little sister crying telling me I need to head down to the hospital. He had emergency brain surgery that night. For the next few months he was in intensive care. He was in rough shape. He moved to and assisted living home when he was was finally stable enough. Constantly in and out of the hospital because of the negligent care he was being provided. My mom would spend every free moment with him. Wake up visit him, work and then back to hang out with him till he fell asleep. I know they always loved each other but until then I am not sure if I truly understood true love. You can see it in their eyes. My mom is a pretty strong and incredible lady. Now he is in a great facility. My mom bought a used handicap van and brings him home regularly to hang out there and he even gets to spend the night in his own bed sometimes.

Life is crazy. You never know what sort of curveball is going to be thrown at you. The first time I ever rode a motorcycle was up and down the street in front of my parents house on my dad's Hodaka Combat Wombat, that he had since before my folks got married. I have a lot of fond memories with my dad as from when i went with him in his truck to mow lawns for a few bucks on a saturday to when I was sixteen thinking i was a bad ass and i tried to fist fight him. He whooped my ass!!!

It's hard seeing someone you spent your whole childhood admiring being so defenseless and at the mercy of others. But I am glad he is still around and i got to spend the evening with him last night while my mom was out of town.

This photo was possibly taken the night i was conceived.

Took this of my dad last night after he had dinner.


  1. Shit, I've just spent 10 minutes trying to word something right so I could say how I've had small taste of what your going through. Its tough to see someone who as a kid you thought was totally invincible grow older and have problems. It really changes your view on life, makes each moment with them mean that much more. A few years ago my Pops struggled with some heart and lung problems due to a doc giving him the wrong meds. The meds attacked his lungs and he was basically a dead man walking. We were at the boat races and he was constantly coughing and could barely breath, but he still finished 3rd place. A week later he's in the ICU. He spent a month in the hospital and was in an out for the next 6 months. I always thought he was a crazy bastard for racing a blown alcohol sprint boats, but when you look at the big picture, the boat racing wasn't dangerous, it was taking meds from some doc who didn't know his shit.

  2. We could all go at any minute...Time is not on our side and it's precious so spend it with your family and friends before it's gone.

  3. humble-ing for sure.
    good words. no matter how
    much you fought it as a youngster
    you got so much wanted or unwanted
    from your parents. make it count.

  4. Even the tough guys have a heart and I believe it is not stupid to cry for what you love, rather I find it beautiful

  5. Damn roughest shit ...Hope you have many giod memories to come..what a strong guy..My pops just overcame cancer and is still my hero too ..he got me into bikes and building..We are actually gonna build a bike together now and hes rollin to Bornfree wit me on his bike..MUCH LUVV!!

  6. Man enjoy what time you have with your dad, I lost mine when I was 15 and not a day goes by that I don't think of him!

  7. Ya stoked he is still around. He has hard time communicating verbally but it's amazing you much he says just through expressions. Plus he still has his crazy sense of humor.

    Max it's funny you mentioned inheriting wanted and unwanted traits from your folks because i was saying the same thing to my brother the other day. There are a million ways I am stoked to be just like my dad and an equal amount of things that I wish I never picked up. Like never finishing a project. In his defense he rarely finished one because he was always busy helping his friends and family with their shit.

  8. lost my dad to cancer when he was 49..i was 24..that was nearly 20 years ago and i still wish he was here every single day.

    nice words mate.